The Muppets!

I adore, no I'm absolutely in love with Miss Piggy. She has been my idol since she first appeared on my television set 100 years ago. She has strength, power, class, beautiful hair and makeup, fantastic clothes that would make Barbie jealous, and alas, she had the love of her life, Kermie. Thankfully, our taste in men differ, although I'm sure my friends would disagree...I'm really not into smaller, green, squeaky voiced boyfriends, but hey, it works for her. Unlike Miss P, I want a man who is larger/bigger than me, taller than me, doesn't need to be better looking..heehee..but not someone I could toss if I got mad enough. Not that I'm a violent person, but if I get pissed off with a boyfriend, it rarely is a pretty sight. My family does not call me "Ice Princess" for nothing. Anyhoo, Miss P and her gang are coming back to the big screen. Thank you Jason Segel, he made it happen. Interesting to note, both Miss Piggy and Scarlett O'Hara were role models of mine when I was younger. Scarlett was a lady but if she got mad, well 'fiddily dee' there was hell to pay, poor Rhett. Miss P, on the other hand, well if Kermie did not make her happy, there was hell to pay..wait, does anyone else see a theme here? Yes, what we fabulous ladies all have in common is...wait for it....accountability. If you mess up, and you know you do, we will call you out like a coach calls out a worthless pitcher. That's right! And to be honest, I don't see why that's a bad thing. We should all be empowered to be who we want to be, and act in a firm yet polite manner. I know Miss P wasn't necessarily that, I mean she could whack a frog or whatever Gonzo is, to the wall, but she did make her point. Have I?

15 days since my last confession

Today at work, we had a Tornado warning that kept us in a hallway....with other co-workers...for a freaking hour. Yes, you read that right, a full 60 minutes of being in a subwayish tube. We had people lined up on one side and people lined up on the other side. Some stayed in the middle, but me and my friend were on the side chit chatting. As I sat there listening to the buzz of convo's around me, I couldn't help but ask myself, 'is this all I have accomplished'?

This past weekend, I had a pity party for myself. I am usually not the one who needs picking up. However, there I was driving to my gurl's house to walk her pretty doggies, and I drove through the hot spot of Auburn, Carl and hold on! Winder.

For those who don't live here, picture 'Deliverance' except scenery gets worse as you drive. So there I was thinking about how much I have in savings, (almost none), how much I had in my checking account, not enough to fill my little Toyota and my birthday is coming up, which means yet, another year older. Lucky me. Fall is also a time when I used to have an on-off relationship but that ended 6 years ago. I'm fine with that being done, but I couldn't help but think I have not progressed much since then. I still work at the same company, (love it), same job more or less, same car, house etc. I am almost 801 years old, and other than my two beautiful, thoughtful, bouncers for sons, I have no accomplishments. As I sat there in the hall today, I thought, hmmmm, maybe a higher being is trying to tell me something.But what I ask? Unless I finish my degree there is no jumping up my current corporate ladder, I really have no interest in going back to school anyway. Next option, I take care of my pets, but do I want to have a 'pet sitting' job? highly unlikely. I love blogging, but I was told by Shelly and Deb that my run on sentences are annoying and I need to work on them. (how am I doing so far?) So that leaves me with what? Good question, when I find out, I will share with you all.

Bullies PART 2

My first born just doesn't get how some people are easy skinny. And I have talked with him and my ex regarding razzing on my other son. they wouldn't think of saying something to a person at school or on the street, because they don't find that 'acceptable or kind' um, making your brother feel like crap is also not part of the 'big brother' code either. He looks to you for guidance, not insecurity. Especially in this world as is it now, we need to love our family and friends, treat people with respect, generosity, kindness. It shouldn't be just for strangers, start at home. It breaks my heart when number two says something, while fluffing it off as them 'joking'. My ex doesn't joke, at least he says things with medical meaning vs his brother who is just down right cruel sometimes. Ok, ok, I MAY tend to be a smidgen sensitive about the issue, I used to get called names when I was younger by idiot schoolmates. But never, ever, by my blood. I also don't want you who read this, to think that number 2's life is a living hell, it's not, and he knows they both love him, and want him to succeed. Number 1 has number 2's back if outside forces attack. But dayum son, you break my heart when you do this to your brother and you don't have to.....Please rethink your comments and if you need to make any, make them constructive, helpful, encouraging. Because that's what you would do for a friend or outsider, and you know it....I might even be PMSing, but dang it, don't pick on momma's baby!

Bullies PART 1

There are bullies we know from school, bullies on the street/club and even, in our homes. As you know, I have two amazing sons, different in a lot of ways, but generally very compassionate. Having said that, my youngest came home today and told me 'he wants to lose weight'. Let me give you some background on my 'spare' son. He came in at a whopping 10 pounds 15 ounces, 22 inches long, via c-section, thank you baby Jesus. So we just knew this was my Gator linebacker, hurrah! Number one son was 7 lbs, 9oz and 19 inches long, scrawny. I didn't eat any different with either of them, in fact, I wasn't as hungry with the 'sack of taters' my ex used to call him that, so I actually lost weight being pregnant with him. Score! So my point is this, number one is 18 years old, 6'3 inches, and skinny. I compare him to Edward Cullen. Beloved number two, is 14 years old, 6'2 inches and still growing, but thicker. I wouldn't call him fat, just growing into his size. He doesn't have rolls, look like he needs to be on Biggest Loser, or even sit around and eat all day long. When he hit puberty is when the little extra came on. I tried explaining that to number 1, and his reply is always 'I was only like that for 1 summer'. Ok bravo, good for you. You didn't get your mummy's 'chubby' gene, not that number 2 is chubby. Not going to lie, every one on my side, minus my dad, has had weight issues. We were not all graced with the size 2 bodies. My sister is 2 inches shorter, built like Jessica Rabbit, but is not fat. I am broader in shoulders so I look heavier even when I lose weight. My mum has always been watching her weight, it's just how it is. We don't bully, belittle or make each other feel like crap, about weight. If you do something wrong, BELIEVE YOU ME, you will be called out. But I digress. My ex and number 1 tend to make number 2 feel like crap because he is bigger. My ex has always lifted weights, so he is not a small man, but he isn't chubby either, even now at his advanced age. (hee hee)

I had a party....

Last Saturday, I had a cookout. I haven't had a part-tay in a few years, so I gathered my Buford Shore babes, my hilarious friends, and my girls that I hang with  Twas a lovely October afternoon/evening. Buford Shore Matthew, invited peeps he knew, so we had more than expected, but since I knew most of them, and nothing is missing from the house, all was well. My friend Baab brought brisket that was to die for, seriously, it would cure the war issue. Baab makes me laugh like few do. He is so quick with the wit, sarcastic, funny and does a mean Ethel Merman. My newly pregnant couple Cate and Andrew came up from J-ville. That was a big treat as most of us have not seen them since they left in August. You really feel how much people mean to you, when they come visit. Anyhoo, as the night wore on, it got a tad chilly, so I broke out the bonfire. My back yard is big enough to create a pit, and as luck would have it, a tree limb or 3 fell down a few days before, so even more wood for our fire. My friend G tended to the fire and kept us all warm and toasty, darn me for not picking up marshmallow's, next time. The Buford Shore tore, yes I did say tore, the attached fallen limbs and kept our fire snugly. I put white lights in my pine tree limbs, you know, for ambiance, and I had my Ipod jamming from Country, to Rock, to 80's and 90's dance music. All was lovely and then this femme fatale that Matthew is sharing bed space with, showed up. She was nice and quiet, initially, then they ran to another party for about an hour or so, and when they came back, WHOA NELLY! Out came obnoxiously drunk cougar. But like I said, she started off nice. I have some really unique friends who mean a lot to me. And whenever any of the Buford Shore is ready to tear down my deck and rebuild it, I have the food and beer for payment......

Rock of Love Came to Wild Bills Friday Night!

My posse and I went to WB's Friday night for Bret Freaking Michaels, yes, that's right, BM. He rocked it like it was 1990 baby. He was energetic, sang all the hits, and was as nice a guy as we all saw in the ROL trilogy. I haven't seen a crowd that large in some time. My friend Amby got us 4 passes, and then Deb, Shelly and I just watched the horror unfold. Some of the girls there looked like it was a casting call for ROL. WB's is usually a good time and the last time we all went these cubs were hitting on us. Entertaining as all get out, but you really don't want to tell us group of ladies you are a detective and then be shocked when none of us believe you. Especially since Amby knows quite a few police personnel and she starts asking you for exact location of your precinct and who do you know, etc. I almost felt bad for little cubby, notice I said almost. When you are wearing a douche bag outfit, and trying to be taller than us, which is hard, Amby alone is 5'10 and then she puts on the stripper heels, good luck baby. None of us are gullible either, OK fine, sometimes I am, but even I knew him being a detective was a crock. Stevie Wonder could see that lie. Even more knee slapping was the way some of the coupled girls dressed. Good lord, even when I was married I never looked that bad. These girls obviously don't own mirrors or blow dryers. Have some pride in yourself ladies, and you won't have to wonder why your man is looking around at the beauties who do have some vanity.

Men Intimidated????

Over the years, I've had friends in the dating pool. One of the 'go to' lines I hear them say, when a guy hasn't returned their call, or shown the right amount of interest, has been "he's intimidated by me." Yeah, sorry, NO, this is not the case. If this was true no woman would ever have a date, get married, divorced, or laid. Come on. I don't know who originally came up with this, perhaps Mother Theresa, I mean there was a reason she was a nun, not too cute to look at, but guys are not intimidated by much. And if they were by girls, would we want to date those men anyway? Um, big fat NO. I have dated in recent years, and quite honestly, if you can't take my smart mouth, you are not the guy for me. And my sister and friends would eat you up. And no, I don't miraculously change once we sleep together. Why do people feel the need to change someone they are dating? Excuse me, if you liked my personality before, and I haven't changed it, why are you wanting to change it now? No girl wants the 'whatever you say' guy, if she does she means every once in awhile or when she is trying to get her way. I dated this one boyfriend on and off for about 5 years. The first time we dated, I dated him to get over another guy. My lead male friend said this was the way to get over a love. Anyhoo, Xbf was a 'yes' man the first time. After about two weeks of getting my way, I was done. Look, if I can walk all over you? I'm bored and you are no longer my chew toy. We ladies also don't like the 'my way or the highway' guy either. We like the guy who puts us in our place, but still lets us be who we are. We want the 'give and take' guy. In my case, if I should happen to make a smart ass comment, at your expense, I am inviting you to join my volley. If you let it whiz past you, it will be ok for a few, but then, you've lost my interest and I am looking for the next hunk of love to spar with. I hope you all know that when I say 'spar', 'volley' I am talking conversation wise, I am not into being hit, and I don't know any who are, unless it's for a specific game,  and you all know what I mean. :)